The Wind Out of My Sails

My mother-in-law called in sick for her day with the kiddos tomorrow. It's a blow. Thankfully I got some stuff done already this week and Hayile will be at school while Brady naps, but I was really hoping to get out of here.

I was just thinking tonight how glad I am to be home with the kids but how quickly that changes when a free day disappears. I know I'm spoiled because I even have a free day.

People keep telling me how hard these years are when they are young. I believe there is light at the end of the tunnel but I don't even remember what it's like.

Now instead of the highlight of my day being with friends for lunch and visiting my cousins new baby, it will be the parents workshop at Haylie's preschool at 7pm and working out at the FD after. Not all bad I guess. I could still dress up for at least the workshop. Not so much for working out. ;o) I should be thankful we're not the ones sick. I'm sure our day is still coming.

I've been having fun with the Stella & Dot stuff, I'm excited, but it's hard waiting for things. My first party is not until November 14th and the next not until December 5th. There are still possibilities for others but they aren't on the calendar yet.

The Lord knows best and I'm trying to trust. I HAVE to believe it's all in his hands and should use this time wisely.

I was reading in my journal an entry I made the night before Jenny (now my up-line) called me and asked if I would be interested in doing Stella & Dot. It went kind of like this:
Up at 3:45 am.
Got health care and belly fat on the brain. (the silly things that creep into our minds in the middle of the night)
How am I going to pay off one and get rid of the other.
Then I listed all the things I feel we need and some I want.
Then I listed things I thought we could do without.

So far I've basically made enough to cover health care for this next month and with the anxiousness of this new venture I've lost weight. I know it's not God's will for me to be anxious but it's funny how he can even work through things like that to accomplish a desire of our heart and bless us when we look back. Right now I feel like I would much rather read God's word and spend time in prayer then eat. Food has lost it's luster. I really truly yearn for the Lord. I know he's the one that satisfies. I want to cling to him and not lose hope. I would like to see things through his eyes because it will bring faith. It's said that his unfailing love does not disappoint and I do not want to be disappointed. So tonight I will go to bed and pray for a new outlook on tomorrow, filled with God's purpose for my day.